Happily Ever After?
by Wednesdayite13
Summary: Vampirella gets stuck in a weird place, when she should be fighting on Cybertron! P.S. Robert Carlyle starred in a film called Summer which was set in Bolsover where I live. He was once on the other side of my fence!


**Robert Carlyle in Once Upon a Time. HE WAS ON THE OTHER SIDE OF OUR FENCE ONCE! Ahem, anyway**

Where the hell am I? And who's that? Ooh, he looks nice.  
"Erm, excuse me. Sorry. This may sound strange but...where am I?"  
The man gave me a strange look. It didn't help that I have naturally messy hair and I had the Poke-e-geists had recently done a Kiss tribute concert. I still had the make-up, but it was raining so it ran down my face. I looked drunk. I wasn't!  
"Storybrooke." A Scottish accent! I love a Scottish accent. "And you are?"  
Storybrooke? Then how the hell am I here? No-one enters and no-one leaves. That's what I heard anyway. Although, it's probably to do with the fact that I didn't actually enter technically speaking, I landed accidentally. Crash landed actually, but I wasn't about to admit that. Jazz was always commenting on my piloting skills. Oh, I should probably answer him.  
"Oh, I'm...who are you?" Probably the worst reply ever.  
"That is not answering my question."  
I sighed. "I'm Vampirella, who are you?"  
"What brings you to Storybrooke?"  
OK, I didn't care that he was attractive or that he had a lovely voice. He was starting to annoy me.  
"That's not answering my question." I fought the temptation to say that in a Scottish accent.  
"I am Mr Gold. Why are you here?"  
"What's this? 20 questions?! For the love of Primus. Do I have to do this every time I crash land in a place it's impossible for me to be in?" Apparently he had heard the rumours about me, because he took a few steps back. "I'm sorry. I had a bad day. A bad week actually."  
"Who's this?" I heard another voice. I saw a woman with short, black hair approaching.  
"Just an old friend. We were doing a little catching up." 'Mr Gold' lied.  
"Really?" She walked closer. Any closer that that and I would have had her arrested for harassment. Seriously. Who the hell did she think she is? "Who are you?"  
"Does is matter?" He clearly didn't want this woman to find out who I am.  
"How did you get here?" She asked me.  
"My car crashed." I replied before thinking.  
"You look too young to drive. You look at least 16."  
"I'm 14 actually. My parent's car, but I got bored waiting for the AA so I went for a walk around." Not to sound big headed or anything, but that sounded convincing. I didn't lie much, but I was pretty good at it.  
"I see...well, I must be off. Good luck with your...car." She walked past us and continued down the path.  
"Who's that?" I asked.  
"That's the major." The way he said that sounded almost like he had a grudge against her or something, but I wasn't too sure.  
"Ah. She has a son, right? Not son. Well, kind of. She adopted him, but his real mother is here too. Am I right?" OK, I admit I showed off a little.  
"How can you possibly know that?"  
I smiled. "It's my job to know. I study human behaviour." I do. That's how I got good at my job. That's not how I found that out, but technically I didn't lie that time. And anyway, he couldn't know much about me if he didn't know I could read minds.  
He froze when I said I study human behaviour. He was clearly hiding something.  
"What's wrong?" I asked.  
"Nothing's wrong." His response was way too quick.  
I tilted my head in a creepy way, I usually do this when I want people to answer out of fear that I'll do something horrible and unpredictable.  
"Who are you really?"  
"I-I told you."  
"I know about this place. I know that people here are really fairytale characters. I know that not many people remember who they are supposed to be, but I know you do. So the question is...who are you? Or rather, who were you?"  
"Hi. What's going on here?" Asked a blonde haired woman.  
I jumped back a little. "Woah, you're not a fairytale character. I mean hi."  
She stared at me. Seriously! What is with these people?!  
"Have you been talking to Henry?"  
"Who?" I asked. "Oh, your kid. No I've not met him yet."  
"You sound like a creep." Mr Gold warned me. "She's just an old friend." He turned to me. "Meet Emma."  
"You're the Sheriff?"  
She nodded. "I am."  
"Look. I see a cheese shop. I'm going to run to that cheese shop in a Chariots of Fire sort of way to avoid another awkward meeting."  
Mr Gold turned to Emma. "She's just met Regina."  
"Ah."  
I then realised something. "She's that evil queen person, right?" That earned another strange look from Emma. "Look, will people stop with these looks? Yes, I don't usually make much sense. I was supposed to catch an Unsub, whatever that actually means, but instead I crash landed here. This is nowhere near where I should be. Right now my friend could be either seriously injured or dead! So stop with the looks!" I could have cried, but I didn't want to in front of anyone so I held it back.  
"That bad?" Mr Gold asked.  
I sighed. "Yeah."  
I had a horrible psychic feeling. My friend. It was my oldest brother, Blitzwing. I felt our psychic bond break. I was too late.  
"Is everything OK?" He asked me. Of course it wasn't! Did I look OK? Is everything ever OK?!  
"Everything's fine." I lied.


End file.
